Lifeself

The bad Ego… Or Is It?
Much has been said about the Ego over time—and much of it isn’t flattering. Many equate the Ego with a negative form of selfishness. That’s a mistake. Others claim the Ego is a false self, or that its worldview is illusory. Some say you shouldn’t identify with the Ego, and that true happiness and growth depend on actively fighting it. In this view, the Ego is seen as harmful to your development, the source of your pain, and a force trying to take control of your life—unless you resist it.

 

In short: many regard the Ego as the enemy.

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But they are mistaken!

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The negative image of the Ego is something humans have invented to project their frustration and pain onto. On one hand, externalizing inner pain in this way can help you recognize it. But over time, it creates a hostile relationship with yourself—because the Ego is part of you. There is no Ego separate from you, and no Ego working against you.

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The Ego is essential to your life and development. If you think you’ve outgrown it, you’re mistaken. That’s not to say the Ego is the only way to experience life—far from it, and that’s exactly what you’re beginning to discover. But let me be clear: the Ego is important, and it will continue to be for some time.

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So What Is the Ego?

There are many interpretations. Often, the Ego is seen as our self-image or identity. But that’s far too simplistic.

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The difficulty in defining the Ego lies in the fact that simply saying the word makes it sound like a distinct object in our psyche—something you can pull out, examine, and analyze. That’s a misconception. The Ego is not a separate part of you. It’s not an independent entity with its own will. Again, this is a mental construct we’ve created.

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The Ego is two things.

A way of perceiving and experiencing the world, and the identity that arises when you experience life in that way

In truth, the Ego is more than just one thing. It’s a specific way of experiencing life that leads to a particular sense of your self. Instead of using the word “Ego,” I prefer two more precise terms: Ego-Life Experience and Ego identity.

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These terms better describe what the word “Ego” actually refers to. There is no actual “Ego”—it’s an illusion we’ve created to better understand ourselves, and perhaps to have something to project our inner frustrations onto.

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Even though the Ego isn’t a distinct entity, I still use the word—but I make it clear what I mean by it: a specific (dualistic) life experience and the inner identity that arises from it. On this site and in my books, you can read much more about this experience and identity.

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What Comes With the Ego-Life Experience?
Experiencing life through the Ego is marked by:

• A strong need for confirmation.

• A need to be defined by your surroundings.

• A focus on a behavior that shape and support your Ego-identity.

• A fundamentally dualistic worldview.

• It represents separation from the world around you—and also an inner separation from your subconscious.

• Above all, it represents and support the development of your individuality.

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The Ego as a Stage in Your Evolution
You can view your development as a string of pearls stretching through time. Each pearl represents a stage of self-awareness. The Ego is one of those stages. After the “Ego pearl,” another pearl appears—one with a different color, representing a “higher” stage of self-awareness.

 

So the Ego stands for a specific experience of life and your self—one that we currently need in our development.

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My Definitions of the Ego
As you’ll see on this site and in my books, I work with the following definitions:

Ego-Identity: The identity that arises when you experience life through the Ego-Life Experience. It’s the identity currently dominating you.

Ego-Life Experience / Ego-Worldview: The way you experience life and yourself when you’re influenced by the Ego.

Ego-Force: The force that gathers all your experiences into what I call the Ego-Identity—the center of your self-awareness.

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In short, “Ego” is a word we use to describe the Ego-Identity, and to some extent, the Ego-Life Experience.

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Read more about the Ego and how it was created HERE