​​

In the white light

all colours are contained,

and even if you only see the yellow colour,

while another sees the blue colour,

then you both see

part of the same white light

 

Here I will focus on the Ego and its various aspects: Ego, Ego-identity, Ego Life experience, and Ego power.

 

Although both the Ego and dualism are often viewed negatively, they are essential for your personal growth and self-awareness.

 

Here I will explore the true nature of the Ego.

 

The Ego is not an object that can be held in your hand. Rather, it is like a pair of glasses that you can put on and ‘see’ life through. What you see through these glasses will give you an experience of the world and of yourself.

 

The Ego stands for affirmation, dualism, to be defined by the world, religion with yourself at the centre, taking on different roles, creating your persona, building your identity based on roles defined by the environment/society. It also stands for separation from the outside world as well as an inner separation from your subconscious. It is the centre of a development structure that allows repression and the development of individuality. It can lead to a lack of trust in the world, a subconscious, inner loneliness (EL), constant fear of losing yourself to the subconscious, a constant focus on your self-esteem and the outside world’s view of you, and a self-perception that reflects this.

 

All these things are characteristics of the Ego. It shows that we basically mean several things when we talk about the Ego, which is why it is so difficult to define exactly what it is.

 

One day when I was meditating on the Ego, I saw a long string of pearls. It stretched through time, through the development periods. Each pearl represented a stage of our self-awareness. The Ego was just one of the many stages of our ‘self-consciousness’, and after the ‘Ego pearl’ came another pearl with a different colour, representing a higher level of self-awareness (or consciousness).

 

Thus, I saw many colourful pearls on the necklace. One of them we call the Ego. This pearl stands for a very special experience of life/ourselves, which at this stage of our development is required for our growth, but which will eventually be replaced.

 

1. Some definitions

Let me start with some definitions of the words that I will use below.

1. Ego identity: This is the identity that results from experiencing life via the dualistic Ego Life experience.

2. The Ego Life Experience/Ego-Life View: This is the experience of life and yourself, that you have when you believe in the Life themes associated with the Ego development period.

3. The Ego-power: The power that unites all your experiences with the Ego-Life themes into what I call the Ego-identity, the centre of your self-consciousness.

4. Ego: A word we use to describe the 'Ego identity', and to some extent the 'Ego Life experience'. This word is therefore more diffuse than the other words, since it describes several things. Using this word can therefore sometimes be more confusing than clarifying. However, we use it for lack of better.

 

2. What is the Ego?

The Ego is not an independent part of you, that you can blame for all your suffering.

You have read about when the Ego came to be, and about the worldview that it shows you. You have seen that it stands for separation and dualism, and through this the creation of a self-reflective identity.

 

My motivation behind this appendix is to dispel any doubt about whether the Ego is important for your development. I want to emphasize that the Ego worldview is neither false nor wrong. What is wrong is to believe that it is the only worldview that exists.

 

A lot has been said about the Ego. It has been described as ‘the false self’, something we must detach ourselves from, a kind of ‘veil of Maya’ covering our consciousness, something that is not our real self, and something we must fight.

 

Most of this is wrong.

 

The Ego was created by an initiation.

The Ego and Heart Life experiences show something fascinating about us: we can experience life via two different states of consciousness. How have two such different ways of experiencing life come to be? What underlies these two different life views? When was the germ inside them created? The answer is found in both the superconscious and the conscious part of you. They were created at a time in our development, when a unique combination of superconscious and conscious energies was manifested in our being, a combination that laid the foundation for a new Life experience.

 

An initiation presents us with a fundamentally new way of experiencing life. It is like a quantum leap of consciousness, in which we move from one world to another. It is in the initiation that the very core of the next Life experience is created.

 

There is no Ego that is separate from you

The Ego is not something that you can be for or against, or that you can blame for your suffering, because the Ego is a word and not some 'thing' inside you. Nor is it a 'false personality' within you.  It is a word that describe a unique way of experiencing life. It is a Life experience, and it is the identity, that we find in the centre of this Life experience.

 

'Ego' is therefore a word that describes both an experience and an identity.

 

The Ego as an experience and 'a colour'

You can think of the Ego and the Heart as colours. The Ego is yellow, and the Heart is green – but they are both contained in the white light. You can have a yellow or green Life experience, but the yellow or green colours cannot experience. After all, they are just colours, and colours do not experience anything.

 

Therefore, it makes little sense to claim that the Ego itself is experiencing something, or to talk about the Ego's own Life experience. However, its fine to say ‘a green Life experience’, and ‘an Ego Life experience’. The 'Ego' is therefore just a word to describe a Life experience.

 

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​

​​

​

​

​

​

 

Figure 1. The Ego Life experience. The Ego Life experience is one of the 7 ways to experience life. You can see them as 7 different colours, where the Ego Life experience is the 'yellow' way of experiencing life. However, all the colours are contained in the white colour (i.e., the Source, shown as a star).

 

3. The Ego, but not the Ego Life experience, is an illusion

When we talk about the Ego, there are two illusions that human beings are victims of. To realize this is one of your most important tasks.

 

The Ego seems to have taken on a life of its own, and because we experience it in this way, we can blame it for our suffering and for trying to dominate us with its worldview. When our life feels meaningless, we need to blame something, and we often blame the ‘Ego’. In fact, many people suffer from the misconception that they need to fight the Ego, as though it was a separate hostile part of you.

 

Illusion number 1

This illusion does not deal with the Life experience that the Ego stands for (for we have seen that this is not an illusion), but rather with the role that the Ego has been given. The very existence of the Ego, as an independent part of you, is the illusion! – and an equally important point is, that although the Ego is an illusion, the Ego Life experience and Ego life view is not an illusion, even if it is based on separation and dualism!

Systems and boxes are important tools, that can be used to organize and analyse our Life experiences, but it is equally important to realize when they have played their part, so that you can free yourself from them and discover a higher expression of the truth.

 

So, it's fine to invent an ‘Ego’ to represent what I call the Ego Life experience – in order to understand it. However, at some point, it is time for a higher experience of life, and then the Ego must cease to exist.

 

A good way to start is by acknowledging that it never existed as a separate experiencing part of you, and that it has always represented a certain way of experiencing life – which has now served its role.

 

Illusion number 2

The Ego Life experience/identity is real, and it represents the ‘yellow way’ of experiencing life. This naturally bring us to the other great illusion.

 

This illusion follows naturally in the footsteps of the Ego Life experience, for in its footsteps, we tend to believe that this experience is the only experience there is. Therein lies the illusion! The illusion is not the experience itself, but that we believe it is the only one that exists!

 

It’s an illusion that is far more prevalent than you realize. It’s an illusion that exist in you right now as you read these words. It permeates most of your experiences.

 

Think of when you’re affected by a painful complex/trauma. Then it can be difficult to imagine a life where you are completely free of the pain it instils on you. The illusion convinces you that you will never be without this pain.

 

Furthermore, this illusion is not limited to your complexes, but also affects your whole view on life, your beliefs, your morals, your experience of yourself, and the world.

 

However, there are other ways of experiencing life that are just as true and real. I am thinking about the Heart Life experience, which is a fundamentally different way of experiencing life, where, for example, all your Ego problems and all your lack of self-esteem cease to exist.

 

You could say that the Ego Life experience surrounds you with the illusion that this is the only reality. It's almost as if it makes you fall asleep, so that you no longer question the dream and its reality. Your task is therefore to wake up from your Ego dream, and to start asking questions again!

​

4. Waking up from the Ego dream

Development can be seen as one long awakening, from one reality to another. Right now, we are waking up from the Ego dream.

 

To wake up from this dream, several things are required. First, you must observe yourself in the dream and observe how much you believe in the dream.

 

You need to do this while you are still in the dream. It’s like observing an emotion while experiencing it, and yourself experiencing that emotion.

 

It’s not easy to wake up in a dream. To wake up in a dream is different from waking up from a dream.

 

You are still in the dream, which means that you are still dominated by the Ego Life experience while you are observing.

 

The next stage is to observe the dream itself, to see the Ego Life experience itself and its very foundation. When this happens, you will be ready to discover another reality. You will be able to wake up from the dream.

 

The latter is, of course, a challenge, and only a few can do this at the present time. But remember that observing an emotion is a big step in the right direction.

 

It will have a huge impact on your life, when you become better at observing yourself experiencing a painful feeling (instead of being enveloped by them). It's one of the most important challenges, that you have right now!

 

The emotions are one reality, but what is behind them (Life themes, values, ethics, etc.) is another reality, that you one day will also learn to observe. It is required that you can do this, if you are to truly wake up to the next reality.

 

5. Summing up on the Ego

Let me summarize what I have said about the Ego. The Ego, as an independent experiencing entity inside you, is an illusion that we have invented to understand ourselves and our experiences.

 

By externalizing our emotions and Life experiences, we have created something that we can blame for our problems and pain.

 

Many believe that their most important task is to prevent being dominated by the Ego and that the Ego is to blame for all their problems. Many believe that it is about fighting the Ego, as if it is something inside you that does not wish the best for you.

 

However, this is a misconception. ‘Ego’ is a word used to describe an identity as well as a Life experience. When you are dominated by this Ego Life experience, an identity naturally arises in you, which is based on the Life laws, rules of life, morality, ethics, and Life themes that are associated with this experience.

 

If you are dominated by the Ego Life experience, then your identity is dominated by a worldview that builds upon separation, duality, an inner loneliness, a fear of losing yourself to the subconscious, a constant focus on your self-esteem, a self-esteem defined by the world's view of you, etc.