The end of the Ego – The observer

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The Ego (i.e., the Ego Life experience) will diminish with time, and the first prerequisite for this reduction to occur is that you manage to become an observer of the Ego Life experience.

Waking up from the Ego Life experience

requires an ability to observe it,

a willingness to wake up,

and an ability to experience the world

in a new way

You have a choice – if you manage to become an observer

As your consciousness develops, you are given more and more choices concerning which Life experience, that will dominate your interaction with life.

You have a choice right now, and the choice is increasing day by day – along with the responsibility of making the 'right' choice!

The choice that you have right now, is to decrease your identification with the things and roles that your Ego believes in.

It can be various roles at your work or in other parts of your life, or it can be that you identify with how the world sees of you, how the world defines you.

You must of course bear in mind, that throughout the Ego period you have developed this identification. It is therefore not wrong, and you still need it, but the point is, that it is time to start reducing it.

To be an observer without denying who you are

You have two main challenges. One is learning to observe your reactions (and inner Life experiences) in order not to be dominated by them. The other is to stand by what you are, to be present in what you are, and to live it. There is a delicate balance between these two things, and it is up to you to decide when you observe, when you don't stand by yourself, and when you don't live out something that needs to be lived.

It is possible that when you reduce or eliminate an identity, you will initially experience a phase of emptiness and insecurity. This is normal and not something you should initially worry about. At some point, however, this emptiness must be replaced with something else, otherwise the old identity will come back and fill the void again. This will probably happen many times until you find this ‘something else’ that should fill the void.

Currently, you may identify with your role at work, or with the role as a boyfriend/girlfriend, a mother/father, a tennis player, a photographer, or you may identify yourself with the money you have in the bank, etc. All of these identities play a role in how you see yourself and how your self-esteem is doing (as this is a measure for how your identities are thriving).

All these roles require energy to maintain. When one role is not in balance, your self-esteem suffers, and you seem to lose your confidence. You may feel that you are not good enough.

Growing beyond all these roles does not mean you lose the desire to be a good mother/father or to be good at your job. Be aware of this.

Ego self-esteem is a measure

for how well you live up to those identities and roles,

that matters to you

None of the Ego-roles are bad or wrong. You just need to learn, that your worth as a human being and a person is not really tied up to them. You must learn to identify with something else 'within yourself'.

In the Ego period, your self-esteem is a measure of how well you live up to the things you identify with, and believe me, most of your world is involved in this (how you dress, how you speak, what you work with, what car you drive, the music you hear, what hobby you have, etc.).

The more you think about it, the more you will find that you spend a surprising amount of time tending to your various roles/identities. And you do more than that. You also create new roles to reinforce the overall picture that you have of yourself.

All these roles/identities are means to support your development, but like all means, they will at some point have served their purpose.

In fact, you have already reached this point.

Being able to recognize your roles is crucial in this process. There are two issues here:

1) your ability to discover your identities and how they function in you.

2) your ability to replace them with another identity.

When you manage to observe an identity, you will have a choice when that identity has a conflict.

For example, your work identity may suffer because you find that you have failed at work. If you see this identity from the outside, then you become an observer to both the identity and its conflict, and you therefore have a choice.

You can choose to suffer with your work identity, or you can choose not to.

An identity is like a mask. To remove it, it is necessary that you see it from the outside, and not only from the inside. If you only see it from the inside, you are not really able to see the mask at all.

A mask can be experienced from the inside, but it can only be truly seen from the outside.

The Ego is a mask, and the more times you observe the Ego Life experience, the more you will create a foundation in you, that will enable you to experience life via a higher Life experience.

Being an observer of a Life experience

When you observe an emotion, you observe several things. An emotion is a reaction based on a specific set of values. An emotion is a Life experience.

This means, that what you are observing is a Life experience.

To observe a conflict,

is to observe a Life experience

What does it mean to observe a Life experience? Being able to observe a Life experience inside yourself is almost like observing another person – within yourself – having an experience. So, it’s like observing one of your inner ‘persons’ experiencing a feeling (e.g., a painful reaction).

When you manage to observe a Life experience while it is occurring in you, it can no longer completely dominate you. It is still a part of you, but by observing it, you can see the essence of this experience, the essence of its values, and you can decide whether it should dominate you. This means that you have a choice! You can now choose your Life experience and which one you want to believe in.

Specifically, it could mean, for example, that you no longer believe your surroundings when they say that you are not good enough as a person. You still feel the reaction in you, and that a part of you also believes it. However, you don’t believe in this Life experience anymore, or in the values behind it. The reason is that you manage to observe it and therefore maintain an inner love for yourself in a situation where your surroundings seem to look down at you.

Who is the observer?

We have seen that you can be an observer to a Life experience/feeling within yourself – and that with training, you can master this ability (and even transform the lower Life experiences that you no longer want to be dominated by).

To train the ability to become an observer

is to train the ability to transform

the Lower Life experiences,

that you don’t wish to be dominated by

Who is this observer? The observer also has a Life experience, and this is different from that being observed. So, there are two different Life experiences in play, each with their own foundation of values, and they both exist inside you.

Let's look at the observer. The observer is you, of course, but how can you be the one who observes, as well as the one being observed?

As always, we are in the transition from one development period to another, and in terms of our consciousness, we contain many different experiences, that are at different development levels. There are 'low-Ego' Life experiences (where you appear as a person with a weak Ego – and where the most important goal is to strengthen your Ego), and high-Ego Life experiences (where you appear as a person with a strong Ego – with the desire to live it out), and there are Heart Life experiences (where you have great self-confidence and self-esteem, and where you enjoy working with people).

You experience life through all of them, at the same time, but despite this, there is a centre where you are most represented. It is a centre of consciousness. This centre can be dominated by several Life experiences, but one is usually more dominant than the others. Which Life experience that dominates you is up to you. We can call this centre ‘your identity’.

A good advice.

It is easier to observe others than yourself. It is easier to give advice to others than yourself. It is therefore a good exercise to start observing others and see how their 'Ego' works. It is not that difficult, and the better you get at seeing the Ego in other people, the better you become at seeing it in yourself.

This identity is a product of all your Life experiences, present and past, which have left an 'imprint' in you, and all of them unite as citizens in a society, creating a ‘combined’ consciousness, i.e., an identity that is you. However, the citizens have a 'prime minister', which is the Life experience that dominates you. As in a real society, a prime minister can eventually be replaced.

Life experiences occur when you interact with life. They can involve laughter or tears, or watching a sunrise, feeling pain or pleasure, kicking a ball, or a feeling that your life makes sense. Life experiences can also be a meeting with a boyfriend or a religious meeting with God.

We are filled with many Life experiences. They are found in your consciousness, your subconsciousness, and your superconsciousness. They are built on a foundation. This foundation can be considered as a basic energy that determines your overall approach to life and your overall view on life. The foundation can be an Ego energy or a Heart energy.

When you manage to observe a Life experience, it is less able to dominate you. Figuratively speaking, what used to be a country (that you lived in) has now been reduced to ‘a city’. The city still exists in you, but it no longer makes up the entire country, and you can now regard it from the outside.

Here it gets interesting, because if it is no longer the country that you live in, what country do you now live in?

The new country is a Life experience on a higher level than the one that dominated you before.

Through one Life experience, you observe another. A Life experience can integrate another Life experience into it – just as a country can contain a city – and just as a country is made up of all the cities that exist in it, a Life experience is made up of the Life experiences that it can accommodate.

Let’s take a look at your complexes. Many of your complexes were created earlier in your life when another Life experience was dominant in you. That Life experience still exists, only now it is in the complex. The reason is that when a complex (i.e., a repression) is created, time ‘freezes' for it, and this also applies to the Life experience that exists in the complex. Being an observer to the Life experience of the complex is only possible if the current dominant Life experience is more developed and if it manages to contain the lower Life experience of the complex in it.

This is an example of inclusion, instead of exclusion (repression).

You must therefore learn to include your repressions in your higher conscious Life experience!

However, it is far from always that we manage this inclusion, and many complexes remain hidden because contact with them will make 'their' Life experience become your dominant one!

It is 'dangerous' to the integrity of your Ego (your identity) if the complex overtakes you. If this happens, you will react as you reacted when the complex was created. If it was created when you were 12 years old, then you will react like a 12-year-old.

When, on the other hand, you manage (with the Life experience that dominates you) to accommodate the Life experience that exists in the complex, then you will be able to observe it clearly, understand it, and integrate it into your consciousness/current Life experience.

Inclusion in the Ego and Heart period.

Inclusion is something that takes place in both the Ego and Heart periods. In the Ego period, you include your lower personalities/Life experiences and become consciously one with them, while in the Heart period you include other people, and become consciously one with them.

This is how you release a complex.

A higher Life experience can thus integrate a lower into it.  This is important because it constitutes one of the most important principles of development, a principle that applies to all development periods.

The integration of a Life experience occurs when you manage to see 'all the way around it'. You see the very essence of it.

An example is if you understand yourself for having reacted as you did when a certain Life experience dominated you. Through this understanding, you can show yourself both forgiveness and love.

A complex/trauma is released

by including the Life experience behind it

in your current higher Life experience

It is important that the Life experience that exists in your consciousness is stronger than the one in the complex. During your development, you develop your conscious Life experience to be able to contain previously repressed Life experiences. Now that you are entering the Heart development period, you are in a place in your development where two very different types of Life experiences exist in your consciousness, and where the ‘higher’ Life experience will eventually include the lower.

There are many people who have partially learned to observe a painful Life experience but do not understand why they keep lingering in it. They feel that they have moved on, and therefore despair at being constantly drawn back to the old Life experience, and when this happens they feel that they have regressed in their development!

The reason is that even though they have managed to observe the painful Life experience, they have not really managed to experience life in a new way – via a higher Life experience.

To move forward, you need to wake up from the hidden world of the Ego. Try observing your emotions as they appear in you, instead of just feeling them. Observe them and understand why they occur in you. If you're dominated by them, that's OK. Practice makes perfect, and the point is not for you to stop feeling.

The idea is that you should be able to choose not to let yourself be dominated by lower (and often painful) feelings, and that you should gradually get to know a higher Life experience.